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Cobra Starship are late. Nobody seems to particularly mind. One thing I've learnt recently is that people who work with Fueled By Ramen are surprisingly laid back, given the cult-fame status of the artists, and the mass hysteria of their teenage fans. In the 45 minutes we wait by the stage door for the band to gather, only one person asks us if we have security passes, and he is civil about it. The rest of the time, we are left free to make small-talk with tour managers and support acts, exchange greetings with roadies who have a celebrity status all of their own, and literally gawp as various members of Fall Out Boy saunter casually past us and into sound-check. The situation should seem completely bizarre; most of the men milling around us are household names - or at least they are in my house - yet surprisingly it doesn't. No one even so much as bats an eyelid (although personally, I feel like batting a whole lot more) when a rendition of Michael Jackson's 'Beat It' in Patrick Stump's distinctive voice is heard through the walls. Fueled By Ramen is definitely just one big, weird, happy family, and for the hour or so I spend with them, I feel completely included.

My interview turns out to be with just one member of Cobra Starship; Gabe Saporta, but before this, we are given the opportunity of a quick hello and handshake with Ryland Blackinton (Guitar), and Nate Novarro (Drums), so I can at least say that I've met the lot. Gabe fronts Cobra Starship on vocals, and you'd be forgiven for thinking he was the only member. He is already well known in the industry as former-Midtown bassist, and the band originates from a vision Saporta claims to have had in the desert, where a cobra from the future arrived in a starship (get it?) and told him of his purpose in life. Although Saporta is the main focus of the interview, Victoria Asher aka Vicky-T (Keytar) and Alex Suarez (Bass) are both present and chime in from time to time, and it becomes obvious that there is no hierarchy within the band; they are all equal, all friends, and all in it to have a great time.

OS: The Cobra from the future that nearly killed you in the desert ?
Gabe: It never intended to kill me. I was on the brink of death, but little did I know that I was never in harm's way.

OS: Oh, okay. But the cobra said your purpose in life is "to make sure mankind goes out in style by teaching hipsters not to take themselves so seriously and by telling emo kids to stop being pussies". How is that going?
Gabe: Everyone loves that line over here! How's that going? It’s going rather well, wouldn't you say? I think kids are having fun. I think that, you know, kids are starting to wear less mascara, you know, boys. I think that's always a positive thing. Kids are having fun. Our whole point is to make going to shows an enjoyable experience. Whether someone's preaching from the stage or feigning being upset about something, the one time you go to a show a month, like, forget about your problems and that's it. And the hipsters are like us [gesturing to himself and Vicky-T, who is also in the room]. So we taught each other how to have a good time and stop taking ourselves so seriously.
Vicky-T: Although Gabe takes himself very seriously!
Gabe: I do not!

OS: How would you go about saving the lives of hundreds if there were snakes on your plane?
Gabe: Oh, well.. I mean, I have a special relationship to cobras in particular, but all snakes. I’d just talk to them and be like..

OS: Are you a Parseltongue then, like Harry Potter?
Vicky-T: Yeah, I was just thinking that.
Gabe: A what? I don’t know what Harry Potter is. Is that like Mary Poppins or some shit?

OS: Seriously, have you never read Harry Potter?
Gabe: I hate Harry Potter.

OS: We love Harry Potter!
Gabe: I hate it. No offence to you guys. It's nothing personal. I hate Harry Potter, I hate Lord of the Rings, and I hate Star Wars.
Vicky-T: I hate Lord of the Rings.
Gabe: Lord of the Rings is the worst! When I saw the first one I was like "this is a pretty good story", but it's just the same thing happening, each place they went to. "OH! We've gotta find these people and have them join our battle, and then these people!" Like, the whole story could fit. You don't need a trilogy to tell a story! You could've told it in one movie, you know. I couldn't stand it. I just felt like I was being taken for a ride.

OS: ... so you'd speak to the snakes?
Gabe: I'd just tell them to chillax. Be like "Hey, man. Let's just watch the movie on the plane, you know? You got your own guiding system, you can change the channel, go to the bar, you know? Maybe they’ll let us go up to first class.. just chill out and let’s all have a good time?"
[Gabe laughs and Alex walks in the room just in time to imitate him]

OS: You’re doing one of the songs for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film...
Gabe: Done! Did!

OS: Right. But who is your favourite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?
Gabe: Dude, I have two. When I was younger, I always loved Michelangelo, the party dude, you know? But I also really looked up to Leonardo. I kind of always wanted to have his leadership abilities and his deep philosophical understandings, you know? So I kinda wanted to be a mixture of both.

OS: That would be a really mutant Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle!
Gabe: I'd be really mutated! [laughs]

OS: If you had to lick condiments off each member of Fall Out Boy's body, what would you choose and why?
Gabe: Different condiments for each person?

OS: Yeah. Joe's has to be kosher, and Andy’s has to be vegan, too.
Gabe: Pete, I know. Pete would be spicy brown honey mustard, because he’s spicy and sweet [laughs] Patrick, uh?.
Vicky-T: HP sauce.
Gabe: What's HP sauce?
Vicky-T: It’s so good! It’s an amazing British sauce. Sweet but like, savoury?

OS: So should I?
Gabe: Are you Jewish? What’s that thing we use at Passover that's like this horseradish sauce? I think it's called...

OS: Yeah, I just call it horseradish sauce.
Gabe: Okay horseradish sauce. So horseradish sauce for Joe because you use it at Passover. And uh, Andy Hurley? I'd have to use just straight up ketchup because he's like, all-American.
Vicky-T: Yeah.

OS: Have you ever been in any embarrassing or humorous situations whilst on tour?
Gabe: [really long pause] I mean... everyday I play a show, it’s kinda embarrassing, but that's the fun of it. What do I think? What's embarrassing? Victoria, help me out?
Vicky-T: I'm trying to think.

OS: Apart from last night when you tripped over your mic cable!!
Gabe: Oh, yeah. Yeah, but I've done that a bunch of times. Usually I just trip over myself. I know what's really embarrassing. It didn't happen to me, it happened to Ryland, though. At the last show on the 30 Seconds To Mars tour, we played in LA and Paris Hilton and Britney Spears were there, backstage. And Ryland was hanging out with one of the dudes from Head Automatica, and Paris was walking on the steps, and the dude from Head Automatica shouted: "Hey! Give us a 'Night in Paris'!" like that video she made, and then the dude ran off! Ryland was just standing there, so she just looked at him, and her bodyguards looked at him, and he got in trouble and stuff.

OS: What happened to him? How did he get into trouble? Gabe: He got yelled at. He got in so much trouble on that tour anyway, dude.

OS: Which bands have you had the most fun touring with?
Gabe: I think that our first tour we did, the Gym Class Heroes tour, that was probably the most fun, because that was our first tour. We shared a bus with Gym Class, so we stuffed 15 dudes into a 12-man bus. It was like packed sardines. They’re our bros so it was just a lot of fun being cramped on a bus and going on an adventure. It was cool.

OS: What’s it been like touring with Fall Out Boy?
Gabe: This is going to be our third show tonight. I toured with them before, with Midtown. Those dudes are awesome dudes. I guess the best part about it is there's so many kids here so you can use that opportunity to play for a whole bunch of new fans and make them our fans. Did you guys enjoy the show last night?

OS: Yeah it was great! We thought you really got it from go.
Gabe: Really? Thank you. He [points to Alex] thought it was bad. Victoria thought it was bad. I was the only one who knew it was good. I knew it was good.
Vicky-T: I was in the middle.
Alex: Last night?
Gabe: I knew last night was awesome.
Alex: I, personally, had a really bad experience because a lot of things went wrong for me, so it just kinda ruined the mood for me.
Vicky-T: Well, the funniest thing was that Alex and I, for the first song, I heard only his vocals, not my own, and he heard only mine.
Alex: It was a real disaster. It was like a last minute surprise. You go out there, and like, you’re in the zone and you?re ready to play, and it’s just like "I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING! AAAAAH!!" and you look at the sound guy and he’s like [puts on a terrible London accent] "I don't know!"
Gabe: He's German! He's a German!
Alex: Oh, sorry. [German accent] "Nein know! It is a kick in the ass!"

OS: Which bands or artists do you listen to that you think would surprise people?
Gabe: I guess most of the stuff we listen to, kids never know it, so I guess that’s surprising to them. Like, a band we all listen to is a band called Ratatat. Have you heard of them?

OS: No.
Gabe: They're just an instrumental band, these two dudes.
Alex: It wasn't that surprising.
Gabe: It's surprising!
Alex: I listen to a lot of heavy metal. I like a lot of early Metallica. And Iron Maiden.
Gabe: I like early 80's Puerto Rican music like the Cover Girls and Stevie B. I call it Roller-skate Rink music, but it's actually called freestyle. But when you?re listening to music at a roller-skate rink? that kind of shit, you know? I love that stuff right now, for real. I'm not even joking.

OS: We heard that you love Justin Timberlake.
Gabe: I do! My idea for doing this band was that I wanted to be a punk-rock Justin Timberlake. I think I'm doing a pretty good job, I gotta say. But it's funny because this girl I know, her mother worked at a law firm where *NSYNC were at when they were younger, so she knows Justin. And she gave him our record. And Justin actually listened to it, supposedly. That's what she told me. And you know how we say "I'll be your Biggie, you'll be my Lil? Kim"? So Justin Timberlake was like "Yo, how come he shouts out Biggie? Where's my shout out?" so on the next record, we're gonna do a Justin shout out.

OS: If Cobra Starship was a party, what kind of a party would it be?
Gabe: Well first of all, people would totally dance. Everybody would be dressed fashionably but not pretentiously. Like, put thought into what they're wearing, but not have to be necessarily slaves to brands, for example, like Suarez.
Alex: Like, this is French Connection UK.
Gabe: No, it’s not, is it?
Alex: Yeah.
Gabe: Good job.
Alex: H&M shirt?
Gabe: H&M?! Those aren’t really good brands!
Alex: I got a hole in my jacket, and no buttons on the front!
Gabe: That’s what I'm saying. Alex, he looks good, you know.
Alex: I can go to a party and make everybody look at me. What they're thinking is a whole different story, but everybody stops and takes a peek and goes .... [gasps]

OS: The badges as buttons are a good idea.
Gabe: Yeah.
Alex: You like that?
Gabe: We call those buttons, so it's just buttons as buttons, you know?
Alex: I'm gonna start a new trend, you know? Everybody's gonna start ripping buttons off in miscellaneous places?
Gabe: Um, people would definitely be dancing, having a good time and not caring. There'd just be good music playing... like, Ivy League! [Gabe and Alex laugh]
Alex: Is this the ultimate Cobra party? What it'd be like?

OS: It's what your band would be if it were a party.
Alex: Oh! packed! With all people who are over 6'3".
Gabe: Yeah, exactly, everybody would be really tall.
Alex: Everybody has to be really tall, everybody?s dancing like crazy, drinking a lot, but not too much.
Gabe: The thing is, we're all really so tall, and when you see us on stage you can't really tell that we're tall because ALL of us are tall, you know? And then when people see us they're like "Wow! You're so tall!"
OS: Last night when you were standing next to Patrick [Stump], no one actually realised that he was so short until you stood next to him... including him!

OS: What?s your favourite lyric on the album?
Gabe: There's a couple, but I really like "If you’re strapped for cash, I’ve got for a job for you, my boots need shining, son". I just think it's like, sassy, and in some ways embodies what Cobra Starship is which is like, just having a good time and taking the piss...? As you guys would say.

OS: Yeah. Finally, we think that you should tell Gym Class Heroes to perform "Hollaback Boy"; on their last day as Gwen Stefani's support band.
Gabe: Dude! That'd be amazing!